I have a tendency to be late to things. It is not on purpose and I do not like this fact about myself.
Over the years, I have grown mature enough to pinpoint my faults that cause this personality flaw of being tardy. When younger, I have to admit it was a bit of a “meh” attitude. I didn’t not care, but, I didn’t care enough. Slowly, things started to change.
The second phase of my tardiness resulted from my impatience. I hated (and still do hate) to be on time and then have to wait around for everyone else. There were a few times that I made a rewarding effort to be on time, just to be the first person at a gathering and have to watch the hostess (who was running behind) still wrap prosciutto in bacon. I’d have to make myself busy playing games on my phone, if not asked to chip in to help with final preparations, until the other guests arrived a fashionable half hour late. (My customary “running late” arrival time btw.)
The third phase was that I started adding too many other chores into my “getting ready” routine. When I was supposed to be blending my eye shadows, I would remember the load of clothes that needed to be moved from the washer to the dryer. Or I would finally decide after three weeks of dryness, to water the plant in the front room while the iron was warming up. Getting ready to leave always seems to be the perfect time for any odd task to be performed.
The fourth phase was that I wasn’t as spry as in younger years. The shower that used to take 7 minutes turned into 12. I couldn’t move as fast as I used to, so I now needed more time. Doing my hair took longer, figuring out an ensemble took longer. Makeup application needed advance planning and prep! Good lord, I irritated my own self with the extra time needed to do what I was doing before.
Well, this now brings me to phase 5. The current culprit of my tardiness isn’t anything to do with my lack of effort. It has now become the amount of pills, drops and ointments that I have to take before I can get out of the door! With the drops that I have to take on an empty stomach — but not before or after brushing my teeth — to the pills that need to be taken with food, to the essential oil that has to be rubbed into the skin afflictions, there is no way I can be on time to anything! I am appalled at all the combinations of pills and remedies that I have to take, with conflicting instructions on how they must be taken. And I am baffled at how long this process takes me.
It has gotten so, that I sometimes have to carry a bag with me, out the door, so that I can finish taking the meds on the ride to my destination. Couple this with the fact that I decided to groom the dog on the way out and pull the weeds out of the mulch bed, and it’s a sure set up for being late.
With pill-popping being phase 5, I am so nervous to see what phase 6 of this plight will be…! Dear god, what about phase 8? Will it be a diaper issue by then?